Sorry, But I Don't Want to Love My Body Today
- Penelope (Penny) Cheang
- Oct 11
- 4 min read
Body Positivity has long been thought to be the peak of selflove, endorsed and enforced by every beauty guru, influencer, and billboard of the modern day. However, all this focus on aesthetics and body raises the question: as this movement is brought forth into the 2020s, does it still serve its purpose as a radical movement—or is it only circling back as the problem?
Body Positivity
Stretch marks = tiger stripes. Cellulite is normal. Celebrate every curve.
These are the driving messages of the body positivity movement, a social change that merged with other groups to encapsulate anti-colorism, anti-ageism, disability inclusion, and a pushback on the Eurocentric beauty ideals that dominated the first half of the 20th century.
As the 2000s rolled in with widespread media access and the rise of the internet, body positivity burst from grassroots activism to the mainstream spotlight. Lizzo, Rihanna, Jamie Lee Curtis: public figures of all size, color and age pushed to the face of our billboards and newsfeeds through global ad campaigns like Dove’s Real Beauty (2004) and Aerie’s #AerieREAL (2014). Since then, the movement caught global attention, and soon a new era was ushered in as space was made on stage for figures of all shapes and sizes to share the spotlight.
Yet, as we move into the 2020s, the message no longer lands the way it once did.
Body positivity, despite its radical roots, often returns to the same refrain: you are beautiful, every body is beautiful, beauty comes in all shapes and sizes.
Beauty.
Beauty.
Beauty.
Stretch marks aren’t just stretch marks—they must be “beautiful.” Wrinkles aren’t just wrinkles—they have to be “badges of honor.” Even as body positivity widens the beauty lens, it still insists we look through it. The message comes across not as “you matter,” but “you matter because you’re beautiful.” And doesn’t that sound familiar?
While body positivity has broadened the beauty standard, it has done nothing to lessen society’s worship of aesthetics as the ultimate quantifier of value. If anything, the movement today acts more as a way for corporations to pretend to push out radical campaigns without digging deeper into pressing issues such as sustainable and ethical labour or consumption.
If broadening the beauty standard means all we're doing is widening the cage: why do we remain inside?
[Insert Body Neutrality]
Born as a response to the limitations of body positivity, Body Neutrality began gaining traction online as an alternative perspective in the mid-2010s, particularly among those exhausted by the pressure to constantly “love” their bodies.
Centred on acceptance, it champions that your body doesn’t need to be beautiful—or even liked—to be valued, but rather that that value comes from how it functions as a vessel to keep you on earth. Stretch marks aren’t beautiful because they’re “tiger stripes”, but because they serve as a reminder that you’re a being who has grown and existed. “Body” is not viewed as an artpiece on which you will be graded, but as a vessel for the real masterpiece—you, and your thoughts and feelings.
This approach, while not as affirming or positive as Body Positivity, has been seen to be more accessible, particularly to individuals dealing with chronic illness, disability, aging, or other experiences where “body love” may feel inaccessible or inauthentic.
Concluding Thoughts
This article does not seek to erase the accomplishments of the Body Positivity movement. It was a necessary measure to correct a culture dominated by narrow, prejudiced ideals, and much of the representation and diversity we see nowadays can be traced back to its influence. But as with any social movement, its impact must be considered alongside its limitations.
By continuing to put the focus on aesthetics—albeit in a more inclusive form—Body Positivity risks reinforcing the very system it sought to dismantle. The insistence that all bodies and all features are beautiful still leaves beauty as the ultimate arbiter of an individual’s worth, value, and importance.
Ultimately, the challenge isn't how we can expand the net that catches who is beautiful, but rather why and if beauty should matter. Redefining beauty isn't the radical protest against society it used to be. Instead, perhaps radicalism means recognising that we're all just playing into the upper class's game of ignoring all the other problems this world is facing.
Writer's Notes:
The idea for this article did not come from a singular point or incident in my life, but rather developed over my many friendships and conversations with the women around me, and through my own journey with beauty. As a [Malaysian] Chinese girl who grew up with frizzy, unruly curls, freckles, and a plump figure, I always found myself subjected to one of two things: the usual rhetoric to strive to follow the mainstream beauty standard, or puppy dog eyes and hands gripping mine as they gushed about how “your freckles are stars” and “you ARE beautiful, now don’t you ever let anyone tell you anything different 🥺” (real thing that happened). I never knew how to feel about these kinds of statements, nor of the ad campaigns and news articles championing “unconventional beauty”. I guess I was grateful, in a way. 10 years back, and there wouldn’t have been any positive comments at all—surely having some was better than nothing? However, I always found myself guiltily wishing that people would compliment my art or my jokes instead of using me to fill the diversity quota. As much as I appreciated widening a restrictive, narrow metric of a person’s worth, I couldn’t help being disappointed that we were still using it at all. I wrote this article to collect my thoughts on the beauty movement—gratitude for how far we’ve come, but a wish to move the focus to other matters.
Writer's Biography:
Hello hello! I’m Penny, a second-year Education major who loves overthinking my every conversation, thought and purchase ✨ I’m especially interested in ethics and social commentary, and I love unpacking the hidden social, political, and economic forces behind the interests and opinions we often take at face value.
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